| i really don't know...
i'm so sad it's rediculas. it's nothing i've ever felt before...
it's not heart break, i know that feeling... this is worse... it has somehting to do with my pet peeves...
i don't know, i'm just obsessed with her, i wish i could see her, even just to sit next to her would make me happy. i don't know... i don't understand what i did wrong... i don't understand how i deserved, well, what i got.
it's not like i didn't see it coming... i knew it was, i was trying to stop it... i only made it worse.
it's like the one and only thing i want i can't have... call me spoiled, call me dumb... but i only want her. and it's killing me not to have her. i don't want another gf, or anything, unless it's her.
i feel like i'm going to die, i can't sleep, i'm getting high everyday just to get my mind off of it, i can't focus in class, i don't understand it... none of my firends understand it... not that i have many of those...
i just feel like i've been neglected one style of a girl my whole life... i finnally found a girl who i genuenly liked,
i mean, shes smart, shes gorgeous, she has the same views, she likes most of the same stuff, shes outgoing... she was perfect.... and somehow i fucked it up... it's not like i can't get over her... it's that i don't want to... i want to want to get over her...
i wish someone like my brother could just come slap me around, set me on the right path and fix everything thats wrong right now... life sucks, it really dose, and for the first time in a long time... maybe a few years, i'm earnestly crying.
i need a confiding partner... someone i can talk to, someone to care for me, someone i can trust....
but theres like no one left in texas like that...
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| i don't care if you want to talk, or anything, anybody!
but i don't want to talk, my fuckin throught hurts, i don't wanna stay up past 10, my fuckin head hurts.
i don't wanna joke with you, it fuckin hurst to laugh.
i don't wanna see you, your not my fuckin girlfriend.
people have come to see me that i don't even talk to, and yet my own girlfriend is to buissy to stop by and say hi?
i hate being sick. i hate taking pills, they always piss me off.
i hate this shit, all i want is my fuckin nintindo wi, zelda, and everyone to go away..... i want everyone to stop texting me telling me about how great your week is, how much fun youve had, and all this other shit, because i don't give a fuck!
grrrrr...
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| i tried to apologise... i just didn't know how else to say it... sorry it was so harsh.. but it's been on my chest scince the first time i saw you again...
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